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Many years ago my friends and I would sit around and play what we called "Jerry Springer: the Home Game". The object of the game was to see how many upcoming shows we qualified for, with the story to support our claim, and whoever had the most at the end of the program won. I was the reigning champion. This book started off as just a lighthearted collection of anecdotes, stories shared with friends over the years to both the horror and delight of my audience. But as I began to write I realized that the humor of my life comes not from the light moments, but the dark, and without those moments being included much of the humor would be lost without that context. This book is a bit darker than I initially intended, but I hope that while reading this I can make you smile, even on occasion laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of the situations I have found myself in over the years, and that you, like me, can find the humor in all the dark places. I do not believe I have any wisdom to share in this telling, nor is it even an inspirational tale of achievement by overcoming adversity, it is simply my life that I have survived. For better or for worse, this is the mostly true, fairly accurate, and almost completely factual account of my life. Some liberties have been taken to protect the somewhat innocent and a few small embellishments were made for the sake of a good story.
- Sales Rank: #164597 in eBooks
- Published on: 2015-09-30
- Released on: 2015-09-30
- Format: Kindle eBook
About the Author
Lisa Orban was born in Galesburg, IL in 1969. She was moved by her parents (without even asking!) to Quincy as a small child. Bouncing from parent to parent, and house to house until at 16 she was given a broader tour of the state courtesy of foster care. At 18, she voluntarily left for Phoenix with a high school friend where she lived for three years. After returning to Quincy, she went to college and earned an Associates of Arts in Psychology, with a minor in Art. Over the years she has held many jobs, but never quite found the right one. She has written poetry and short stories on a variety of subjects from raising children to finance for online publication. Finally in 2013, after much urging from her friends for years, she sat down one day and started writing about her life.She is the mother of five children, all grown and gone, except her youngest. Which she is sure is trying to drive her mad (as all teenagers do) and has plans to write another book in the future about their childhood, much to their anticipated dismay.
She currently lives in her hometown, in the house she loves, and at the center of the chaos she enjoys so much. Often surrounded by her children, her loves, friends and the strays (both two legged and four) she takes in. She continues to seek out new adventures, misadventures and new mistakes to fill the pages of her next book, laughing as she goes.
Most helpful customer reviews
5 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
A Must-Read. Should be Mandatory for All Participants in Foster Care & Faculties in the Educational System. Laughs & Tears.
By Bill Anderson
Length: 302 pages.
When the author contacted me seeking a review, I agreed to read this as a free borrow through my Kindle Unlimited account. Within 50 or so pages, though, I was so overtaken by the trials and travesties within this story that I bought it for my Kindle library. It is a hard book to put down and forget about.
Although I am giving this first edition five stars due to its immense potential value to society, as should be apparent in the paragraphs below, there is a visible need for professional editing that I hope the author will understand and employ.
Most of the editing errors concern commas or, what I call, autocorrect stumbles. Before I discuss that, I often commit these types of mistakes myself. Often I commit glaring spelling errors, myself, because I have vision problems while writing on my iPhone, and because I’m afraid to turn off the autocorrect. Further, unlike the errors I can’t miss seeing that are committed by others, no matter how hard I try, I am unable to successfully proof my own typing. If and when I write a Kindle book I hope I have the sense to search for and employ a professional editor.
That brings us to our discussion of this otherwise terrific book It’ll Feel when it Quits Hurting. The author commonly uses the possessive sense, or the apostrophe, in places where it is not proper, or does not use it when it is needed, but far less frequent is this mistake. And, on a very few occasions, such as location 2246, (the last line just before the chapter heading My Kingdom For a Story, the word shallow is used instead of swallow – this is the sort of typo I refer to, correctly or not, as ‘an autocorrect’ error.
But please don’t let such mistakes and oversights spoil your opportunity to gain an insight that is of utmost value in our society. The stories of this writer have likely been on for eons, but, as our society slips and slides through the current phase, these tragedies are gaining frequency. At least, that is my belief. At any rate, more of us should get her perspective into adolescence during foster care.
Yes, I know it is tough being a parent, and still tougher being a foster parent. After all, manuals and procedures and studies and installation/operating instructions are prevalent for most anything in our society, except as regards raising a child or in maturing into middle age or into the status of becoming a senior citizen.
Also, the faculties in our school districts should be required to read this book. There is a bit in this memoir that, while it is hilarious in the reading, it speaks volumes in terms of the prejudice and inherent profiling (racial and otherwise) that pervades our educations system.
But, even those instances are not adequate summaries as to why I rate this a must-read, five star triumph.
The author’s life is much that of a character in a Stephen King masterpiece. She is almost Carrie in the flesh. Yet, despite failed parenting and failures by most of those caring for her in her years as a foster child, and despite the snafus within her school years, Lisa Orban, the author, grew up and bettered herself by attending college and earning an Associate of Arts Degree in psychology.
I suppose one reason I can so readily identify with her growing up is, my first wife (of 26 years) had also spent time in foster care in Ohio. She also had a horrid experience in her home, with her step father, after she was recovered from her nightmare in that previous foster care. Her siblings also experienced hardship and tragedy under the same roof.
But, unlike my first wife, Orban was born during a later period, a society only beginning to trudge through the result of the sexual revolution and racial/sexual/sexual preference issues, and, itself, a victim of the Supreme Court decisions regarding school prayer and abortion. I know my fellow liberal democrats will not look kindly on that statement, but, I believe in candor and openness. Our society has been reaping what earlier Supreme Court decisions sowed.
Anyway, I know this is a review of Orban’s works, not a platform upon which I should pontificate. My opinion, as stated above, though, has pertinence to the appreciation of a rollicking good roller coaster ride through life by someone who has dared to open herself up to ridicule in order that we can enjoy the trip with her, or share the joys, heartbreaks and fears with her.
I pray, though, that a sufficient number of readers gain an insight into her topsy-turvy life and rejection and love so that we can make a better system for the care of children, especially in foster homes, and in schools, for the children she and her children bring into our world.
Oh, her story of her grandfather is terrific, reminding me of one of my mother’s boyfriends when she was quite young. He was a twiddler and my grandmother asked him if he could do something besides twiddle like that. His reply? He reversed the twiddling.
The overarching message I took from her narrative of grandfather was that it instilled in her a certain innocence and love that, deep down, permitted her to survive the grief that was to come.
Again, this is a must-read story that should be compulsory to all foster-dare homes and the entire educational system. There is a wealth of education between the covers of It’ll Feel Better When It Quits Hurting.
5 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
A rare gem
By Sandy Toes
I laughed, I cried and most of all, I FELT. Sorrow, joy and amusement in equal measure. I also felt the echo in my own life of some of Lisa's stories, especially her teenage and young adulthood escapades. I think every reader will feel the same connection to some parts of Lisa's life. Reading like a series of short stories with a lifetime arc, this is a book that was hard to put down and one I highly recommend.
Lisa's book suffers from many grammatical errors, as do most self-published books, but unlike the fictional pieces I've read, the errors and mistakes didn't get in the way of the narrative. They're easily forgiven because of the knowledge that this is, above all, an honest book that doesn't spare the author or the reader. This is a book like none other I've read.
The author provided the book free of charge to me in exchange for my honest and unbiased review.
4 of 5 people found the following review helpful.
Foster Care: What is it, really?
By Whowrotewhat
IF you don't give the topic of foster care much of your time, you may want to live the experiences of Lisa Orban, who will certainly give you much more than an executive overview. I was raised in a few orphanages in the 40s and 50s so I had empathy with this unique author's look back at her past. Her book is quite informative and may very well become the "bible" on the foster care industry. Parents especially will benefit from reading It'll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting. Be preparied for both shock and amazement as it also deal with the troubling reality of domestic abuse. But like icing on the cake it also provides you with humor to soften the blow. Any domestic violence organisation would surely benefit from the messages in Lisa's well-written book. If you have never met a domestic violence survivor, you must meet this author. You will be both blessed and enlightened.
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